filled and fooled


The Longest Quick Update Post Ever – Part One


Call it Manic Monday if you want.  Call it late Boobday.  Either way, Happy 2014!

This post is to celebrate January 3rd’s SEE THROUGH Boobday, and to give you a quick recap on a few sexual experiences my husband and I have had that I haven’t yet shared about. 


My nipples say “hi” (and possibly, “thank goodness the scissors avoided us on Tuesday night)

Happy See-Through Boobday!


And as you know I like to always add more shots of my tits, because for a long time I felt like they are my best asset.  Oh the things I’ve learned…


Maybe this one?

IMG_20140106_080420I like the way the black falls over my face but the pose I was doing makes my boobs look lopsided.  And I don’t care either because for some reason I like this pic.

Hi, okay eyes up here now.

This is where, if you aren’t into reading about some bisexual swinging adventures, you want to navigate away (noooo!)… but instead check out some other photos, or read about this Fireman Fantasy or click on the Boobday button above to check out some other lovely boobs.   Of course, if you want to get caught up on who I am talking about below you can click here to my Key Players page.


A few months ago we found an ad on Craigslist for a bi man seeking another couple.  At the time I wasn’t all that interested in meeting another guy and I told my husband as much.  I found the swinging we were doing to be getting boring, the rejection of Chloe (or was it Rick, we don’t know) turned my sex drive down a few notches (as well as my self-confidence), Green’s “bootycall” behavior was making me feel a bit more slutty than I like.  All this was making it hard to write about sex, read about it, and do it.

However, I was willing to give another MMF threesome a try and we replied to the ad, which led us to meeting Tony.  Tony didn’t immediately strike me as handsome, but as our conversation went on I liked him more, you know, not what you expect from Craigslist.  He was about ten years younger than us, he took good care of himself, and had a lucrative career at a place we knew was competitive to get a spot in.  And we held great conversation for a while before we went to the bedroom.  Awesome!

It was an amazing night filled with new firsts.  Tony was orally bi, so there was the moments of me laying on my back while he rocked into me and we took turns pressing our lips to the dripping head of my husband’s cock.  (Note: Sexual Bucket List item crossed off when Tony took over and made my husband spurt). There was the moments of my husband and I sharing Tony’s lovely curved member hungry to win the race placed in our minds.

Tony was a BIG fan of squirting, it was his ultimate fantasy to meet a woman with the ability, so we gave him quite the show that night.  I’ve never in my life squirted so much, they played me like a water-filled fuck doll and I truly loved it.  It became harder to not squirt when my body was touched.  We all had such chemistry, it was like we’d been doing this forever.  In the final stretch of the night Tony looked in my eyes as he fucked me hard and I gave him a look like, “thank you.” I knew it caused him to retract from my warm pussy and blow his load all over my stomach (it was such a turn-on knowing my eyes did it).  I was quick to rub the cum in my skin, I just wanted him all over me so bad at that point.  My pussy was still gushing and pulsing as he pulled away.

We were all so satisfied that night, as we were all saying goodbye it was unanimous that we all get together again very soon.  But here is the problem:  Tony sent a text that night to say thank you and that he had a great time, but then we didn’t hear from him for a long time.  After multiple texts he didn’t reply and we gave up.  But then I asked my husband to send one last text asking why he wasn’t interested in us, and Tony finally replied.

I had a bit of a stomach flu leading up to day we met Tony.  I felt good enough to see him after a long hot shower.  But somehow, some way… okay, his text read something like,  “I didn’t reply sooner because I wanted to find out what was going on with this bad bladder infection I got after seeing you guys.”

I was pretty fucking mortified at that point.  Dirty.  Oh my god.  I give people infections.  I felt tainted even though I actually felt fine and had no symptoms of infection myself.  We relived the experience of that night and determined that it must have been when I was backing into Tony,  he held my hips and rammed into me while my husband put a finger (possibly two) in my ass, causing me to contract and squirt.  He was drenched.  We offered him a shower but he declined.  And now some how I gave Tony an infection.  He has never wanted to see us after that.

So, a string of rejected feelings, and probably a few nights where I felt all sexed up but didn’t communicate it or felt too tired to fuck, it all caused me to really start wondering what this swinging shit was helping in our relationship.  To be honest with you readers, at that time I was also suffering from some really intense down feelings that I couldn’t combat with exercise, a steady stream of sugar and a ton of weed-smoking.  I reached a few low-points that made me realize that something in me needed to change before I became someone I didn’t know anymore.

I was going to title this post “Transparent” to go with the SEE-THROUGH Boobday theme, and also to have the double meaning being that I’m going to be really real with you here.  You call me genuine and for the most part I am.  But I wasn’t outwardly expressing the fact that I felt pretty helpless about everything in my life more than I felt sexy and happy.  Still, the constant during that time and now has been that I deserve to get to know my sexual self.  I never stopped reaching for her even when I wanted to give up (my husband can vouch for how distant I became),  I grasped for the girl that I lost a long time ago and the woman I haven’t made time to get to know until now.  This was a way for my husband and I to stay connected during a time that I wanted to run away because of depression.  I always talk about blogging helping me, but damn it is so true.

But when things get bad enough, you have to call in the big guns.  You give it a chance, take the risk of talking and seeming weak and you get on meds.  And I think they are working pretty well.  I’m going to pause right now and post this.  And will continue with the second part to this right now.

35 thoughts on “The Longest Quick Update Post Ever – Part One

  1. Great big hugs and kisses. As always I appreciate you “keeping it real.” I think a lot of us forget about those shitty low points in life. As much as we want to celebrate and share the good times, we need to know that the low times can be shared as well, and darling, you are more than welcome to share them with me any time you need. xo

  2. I’m happy to see you’re still here. Great tit shots and even better transparency in your words. Keep up the fight.

  3. Lovely as always… I hope the New Year brings many more posts and pleasurable (for you and your readers) stories…

  4. You do have the most spectacular breasts and I love how you adorn them.

  5. I’ll fuck you G, don’t get off the roller coaster! (I’ll even it let your husband suck my cock, if that’s the price of admission).

    But seriously, have you considered not smoking so much weed? It affects people differently, and maybe that’s what’s causing you to feel down/depressed at times?


    • Interesting Nero. First of all, yes let’s hook up! Now, yes I consider quitting it often because I hate feeling a need for it and I know my body could use a break. It isn’t who I want to be. But I have serious addictive personality traits going on here. I don’t need it, true, like I need food and water and love and shelter and fucking and fucking and fucking.
      I appreciate you saying that, more than you may know. Xoxo

  6. Nero is right, G. Weed could be exacerbating it; you’ll have to dig deep to determine that for yourself. Technically, and inarguably, it does affect meds you’re on, so keep that in mind, too.

    But you must know how black this kettle is. I know it’s hard to let go of a go-to relief-giver. Anyhoo, big hugs to you.

    Oh, and lastly, you have no way of knowing that dude got an infection from you. Don’t take that one on, too. xx Hy

    • I’ve thought a bit about what you said, and you could be right about the weed. My husband scoffed at the idea of me quitting, it has become a way of life, normal like drinking a glass of wine after dinner. Sure, I took it a little far and I’ve decided to cut back. I think it will be good for me.

      And THANK YOU for saying that about Tony’s infection. I had such a hard time getting over that because I actually liked the guy a lot and him looking into my eyes while fucking me changed A LOT for me. Sigh. Thank you for always listening and being there for me Hy, I owe you big time.

  7. BEST PHOTOS EVER! I love that shirt, I love the way it looks on you and I am just more than tickled and tingling all over – what a way to start off the new year. Yummy

  8. Crap I hit post before I could finish out of pure delight: infections do not show up that quick, there is a good chance he had something going on before he met with you guys and you should not feel responsible – he knew the risks as well – the urethra sometimes gets a bit messy… human bodies are not perfect. He might have a history of them, who knows.

    As for the insight into yourself and what you write here – we have no right into your private thoughts unless you choose to share them but that does not mean I would read you as anything less than sincere. You are and you present things with some class and grace that … this might sound harsh but… unlike some people without filters it is was makes you so perfectly sane and normal. I like your blog and the way you write and I like that you keep things to yourself – and once you figure something out should you chose to share it, i like that too.

    • So maybe I could change the memory of the Tony encounter to him feeling bad that he may have been getting something when he saw us, and was worried when it fully showed up, worried that he could have passed it to me (rather than the other way around).

      As far as filters, yes I dropped those long ago, because life is so filtered already. I took this chance at building myself in truth because who I am here is almost unrecognizable to the G out there. Not that I’m not being myself, its all about filters.
      And I just felt I needed a little push to break out of the rut I was in. Not every encounter ends well it is just reality and I couldn’t wrap my mind around whether I should play like it never happened or embrace it for the good parts. I don’t feel like I owe readers anything, but I do owe myself, since I set this place up to be my unfiltered and free expression zone, to gloss over the downs wasn’t serving my soul…I guess you could say…

  9. Ah, lovely G. You’re gorgeous and I love your transparency. I hope things continue to improve. Hugs to you, beauty. 🙂

  10. You are so beautiful and open and such a breath of fresh air. Every week you bless us with a surprise and this week was no different.

    I have to agree with the other commenters about the infection. Do not take that on yourself, you have no idea how he got it.

    Also, realizing that something in you was off and being able to realize that is HUGE!!!! As the spouse of someone who suffers from depression I can tell you that acknowledgement in of itself is so important and a major step in you reclaiming your life.

    Love ya girl! If you ever need an ear, I’m here!

    P.S. Wasn’t Kaepernick looking yummy Sunday? Lip licking good!


    • Yes it was quite the boost to take the step of getting on the medication. The first few days were interesting, where I felt my stress reactions melt away but I still felt the pressing sadness in the background of my mind. But having taken the step of getting help kept me energized and hopeful.
      Thank you so much Tis, I love you too! I will take you up on that if I need it, but like you know its so hard to talk about it but so easy to curl up and keep it all in.
      Fuck yes, OMG that man is so hot!!

  11. Very well-told story G! Not bi myself but an interesting read. Also, your boobs look incredible in that first picture.

  12. Good work on the pics – and the bucket list, G!

  13. I like. I WANT.

  14. Pingback: MY SEXUAL BUCKET LIST | filled and fooled

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