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I’m calling you out!

34 Comments

Hey You Bloggers,
I’m on to you.  I’m starting to think there are “professionals” among us.  “Professional what?” You should ask.  I’m not talking about escorts, companions, or sex workers (although I do follow a few blogs with that content);  I am talking about Sex Therapists, Human Sexuality Professors, best-selling erotica authors, world-traveling erotic photographers, sex-column writers, simply put,  these people have advanced degrees in sex.  And I think they blog among us.

I see myself as a wet pig-tailed awkward little freshman while they comprise the cool senior class; when I graduate to sophomore I’m not sure.  I guess that is all up to me.  All I know is that I’m glad I can hide in the wings and watch them, learn from them.  Don’t laugh. Sure, I have very little inhibition, sexually at least, and I’m not afraid to share a good deal about myself photographically or otherwise; but…I still feel so innocent.  At least I’m willing to try everything (or work on trying it at least) and I feel maybe my advancement to sophomore class is coming soon.

So, I read a lot of blogs.  I try to read all that I follow but it requires long periods of catching up time that I don’t have.  Anyway, I’m finding that my favorite posts are informative based on that person’s experience rather than research, they are sexually arousing, and the post is full of colorful words.  Perhaps they are introducing me to a new kink, or presenting new data on sexual trends.  Maybe they are portraying a relationship dynamic I’ve never considered.  To be able to write something that makes people feel like they learned something yet they are wildly turned-on; this is my goal.

Pervertically Virtuous, authored by Z, gives me something to strive for, and she’s only been  in the WP world for like a month!  She knows what she wants and she gets it, there is no other way.  The way she writes about her experiences is riveting, informative, and provocative.  She can write sex, and she lives it, no doubt.   She is a women who has chosen to do things her way and she has no hang-ups over it.

So now that you see what a blogger-boner I have for her, you can just imagine how excited I was when she nominated me for the Blogger She’d Like to Fuck award!

bilf-award1

Ha ha, I tricked you! You didn’t know you were reading another award post!

Guess what?! There are rules:

1. Thank the blogger that awarded you and if you like, post this most cool award in your post.

I really think it is fantastic that Z nominated me.  She is fucking sexy you guys (take her header as a clue, that is really her!) In fact, she is so sexy she probably modeled for this award way back in 201* when it was created.   I don’t know if you have been to her blog yet, I put a few links up there.  You know one thing I like about her that is totally unfair to a lot of other bloggers? I like that she’s been around a small enough time that I could read every single post back to the beginning.  It is nice to find a blog of that quality and feel like you’ve been there from the get-go.

2. Post 5 sexy suggestions for other bloggers to do, try, or think about.

  • sex under a waterfall or in a meadow strewn with buttercups
  • sex at the Playboy Mansion with a model
  • sex with with the Rugby team
  • sex with someone at least 15 years younger or older than you or both
  • sex on a hotel balcony overlooking a pool filled with people

Okay, really.  This shouldn’t have been so hard for me that I had to make it a joke…  Can I really call myself an authority on enough things that I could suggest you try or think about it? Maybe a better use of my time is to forge my path to advancing to sophomore or even junior status. I’m going to make a five bullet-point sexy bucket list (which still works because you should try it or think about it too):

  • group sex- where everyone feels equally attended to, secure, and appreciated
  • stranger sex/gangbang- maybe that Rugby team running joke isn’t so funny?
  • strap-on sex- I need to feel total control of a situation just once.  Giving only because I want to, maybe if they beg but I’m going to make them beg.
  • outdoor sex- I have not done this enough in my life, even it is camping in the middle of nowhere or sex in a crowded parking lot.  I want that heaving passionate need to just get it done right then and there.
  • blindfolded fantasizing using toys or not- I don’t know, I just thought of this one, never really passed my mind before.  But it would be fun to be blindfolded and made to lay still, not knowing what or who was going to be penetrating me.

3. Post a link to your sexiest blog post and why you think it is your sexiest blog.

Oh man, this is hard.  I wonder if anyone has figured out I’m sort of at a blogging crossroads here?  It has to do with photos.  My first Finger Me Friday post was the sexiest, it got the most hits and the photos came out just how I wanted them.  But the problem is, I wanted my writing to be sexy or the sexiest.  So how about this, I’m going to point back to that fireman story I’ve left hanging now for oh, almost the whole time I’ve been here, I’ve been promising part two for over five months.  No wonder I’m not getting the warm affectionate glances from firemen at the grocery store these days… Should I even say that I still plan to write it?

4. Nominate 5 other sexy bloggers and Let your nominees know they’re sexy.

Sexy Sluts** Road Trip 2013 (SSRT 2013)

Starting on the west coast, this summer.  After renting an RV I will proceed to pick up MariMar.  Rules will be worked out further but most likely they will include something like, “shirts optional” or “what happens on SSRT stays on SSRT”.  We shall head east, picking up any bloggers (I’m sorry but I think one of the rules is also “vagina required***”) who want to join, Hyacinth I’m talking to you (nice pussy by the way) and Cara I don’t know if we are passing by you, but get on girl.  We are heading your way Scarlett! And we are swinging by LSAM’s place and swooping her up for sure.

More details to come, and if we could meet up with lovely C, we would, but I’m afraid we’d have to have a boat, right?

By the way, the ladies above are my nominees for the BILF award.  Four simple fun rules, if you have time, the award is yours.  If I missed anyone I’ve been flirting with, I’m sorry, I guess I am a slut.  Let me know I would be happy to edit the post.

* I don’t know when this award was created but I’ve seen in on posts going back to at least 2011.  Recently, it was resurrected by Nate of Speaking out on Nate.

** I’m using slut for fun here, and I’d never want to offend anyone by using this term.  I know that I have a high moral standing, and am a good person.  For a great post about not embracing that term, see here.

***no offense if you have a penis.

34 thoughts on “I’m calling you out!

  1. I’m a slut and proud! Thanks for nominating me G! 😉 And I agree, vagina requires. xxx

  2. LMAO @ SLUT

    On come on, I do have a good sense of humour about it! I actually clicked on the link (thank you for that)
    funny funny

    I will have to peek in on this blog you mentioned, I love it when people recommend a good read.

  3. Oh hey! I’ll jump on. We’d have fun. Congrats and thanks. 🙂

  4. Thank you for continuing to pass this award around. The community of mature themed bloggers needs more stuff like this, awards directed at them for them.

  5. Blogger I’d like to fuck. I like that. I better not start listing them though. Pretty soon you’d all ask, “hey JK, how come you’re listing everyone?”.

  6. Hehe. I LOVE what you did with the award! Your awesome!! Now about this road trip… *hugs and kisses*

  7. I don’t normally “do” awards, but strangely I am excited by this one…thank you G xox

  8. OMG, I don’t even know what to say to this. I’m gonna have to sleep it off and I’ll write something more coherent tomorrow. 🙂

  9. ohhh I am proud to be part of the sexy sluts road trip…
    Seriously, how fun would this be.
    😉
    Thank you G.
    xoxoxo

    • I can’t tell if I responded? Darn phone/wordpress changes.

      It would be amazing, think of the getting to know you time, such a long drive. Then stopping for breaks and of course picking up the next girl. Fun!

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  11. G, I’m truly honored to have such a overwhelmingly positive, but also substantive, description written for me and my blog.

    When I started blogging last month, it was simply because I had all these experiences and opinions that I wanted to share, but I had no idea what people would think about them and was really anxious about it honestly. I’m a social scientist, and I’d never done anything but academic writing before, so I wasn’t sure those skills would translate into writing for non-academic audiences.

    and I’m still not sure. but having someone like you like what I have to say is very reassuring and makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. I’m especially glad you find my posts informative as well as provocative and sexy. It means a lot.

    a blogger-boner, that is awesome! cracks me up 🙂

    If you do that tour, please count me in 🙂

    • You most definitely have a place on the tour. I’m starting to wish I lived in NY though, besides the UK, that seems like the sexpot spot. We will have to drive circles in the city to have enough time to get to know eachother. Or you can come back to Calif. with me? Ever been to SF?

      Whether I want to be able to sleep with more men or women or to be a Domme or whether I want to be more educated, or less, I still don’t OWN my wants and needs like you do. This is the most powerful message I take from your blog. Ownership without regret, life without self-doubt. Go Z go, I am glad to witness your ride!

      • Those words really mean a lot. And I know you can take ownership of your sexuality and your life – you just have to commit to it and face your fears head-on…

        You live in San Fran? I’m overdue another visit there, I’ll definitely reach out when on that side of the continent!

  12. I think you are very smart – I wonder who the authors, psychologists and others who read sex blogs are. You’ve made me wonder about a lot Smarty Pants!! I must say that this post is great writing yourself!

    • I should note that I don’t keep a list of bloggers and what I think they do in real life, but its not just bored housewives (i am one so I don’t mean to offend). Blogging is interesting, I’m glad I started mine, just getting to interact with people like you that can write, like really write.

  13. **no offense if you have a penis.
    None taken!

  14. I read this and could have SWORN I commented. Thank you so much, honey! I’m flattered you said such nice things about me! I ❤ you bunches! xx Hy

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