filled and fooled


Gratitude Kind of Attitude


Wow, it truly is award season around WordPress.

As you might have guessed from my past posts, I am working on overcoming some bumps in the old self-esteem road lately.  I am working at it still, but I am finally starting to believe getting a compliment or an award means I really deserve it.  I know it sounds weird (or maybe it doesn’t) but I really struggle with getting praise — I have all of my life.

But, today and forevermore, I put my trust in you dear reader.  Take my words and weave them into your own fantasy tapestry.  Let me borrow your soul a moment to launch us into that ethereal plane where my dreams spring our stories from the deep recesses of my mind.  Feel it in your core when I stretch new creative muscles to choreograph my experiences for you.  Smile when I beg you to smile and watch as my fears and frets dissipate when keystrokes meet mouse clicks.

Thank you for being there.

I accept these awards and feel extremely proud in passing them on*.

As you might know, each award comes with a set of rules.  Since I have six saved up for this one post, it might get long;  I’m going to try my best to keep your interest so I might need to cut some corners.  Argh! I don’t like breaking rules!

My new rules include:

1) Accept the awards.

2) Thank the people who gave them to me on their post.

3) Link back to their blogs within my post.

4) Nominate any blogs I want for my new hybrid award (my apologies to those involved in creating the awards originally.)

5) Post a comment on their blog that I find them spectacular, and link back to this post.

6)  Then I ask if they want to pass the award on to anyone else.

This is my secret to learning about even more new quality blogs (hell, what is quality anyway, I love them all.)   Truth be told, the number of exemplary erotica blogs out there already completely overwhelms me at times.  This talent right at my finger tips, free of cost or complicated membership, it sort of makes me want to cry sometimes (in a good way).

7) Write a post bursting with useless information about myself to follow the rules set forth when I was given the awards.

8) Sigh in relief that the post is done, and move on to finishing the fireman story (I know those guys want their cookies!)

The Beautiful-Liebster-Gutter-Awesome Blog Content Award 

I wanted to pass this group of awards on to blogs that are new to me and have quickly captured my attention.  There are so many awesome writers I follow, and friends I’ve made through blogging, that I could sit here for days raving about blogs I love.  But for the sake of time, I narrowed it down to just a few (in no particular order):


Beatnik du Jour–  His soft and sultry poetry and stories always make me smile.   He is a true artist at painting the scene and carefully extracting details that make me feel present in his moment.   I love erotic writing that makes me feel more than horny, his metaphors make me think.

Cliterary Review– CJ is a master (Mistress?) at crafting stories that leave the reader dripping (with sweat, drool, sexy juices, etc.).  Her writing often includes power plays between characters that get my blood rushing.  I don’t know how she keeps hitting us rapid fire with one fantastic story after another, but she does.  Damn woman!  Pussy is one of my fellow whores in the merry band with no leader (this was somewhat of an inside joke).

Confessions–  He has some great stories that really capture my attention.  I will be honest, when I stumbled upon his blog I thought he was actually a teenager who had one hellava writing skill.  But I’m happier knowing that he is a married thirty-something like me bursting with sexy stories to tell.  It is always a good read when I see a new post from him.

Matthew Vett’s Development Blog– He might call himself an amateur erotica writer in his about section, but Matthew Vett has some real skills.  His blog is a place where he develops stories and shares insight of his own and from other writers.  His erotic stories make me warm in fun places, rather than me explaining why, read here.  I really appreciate his behind-the-scenes of writing posts, as they show me just how much work you all put into your blogs.

The Erotic Writer–   I have found myself completely terrified of commenting on this blog, because the three (+) contributors are such nonpareil writers, all I can see is myself doing the Wayne’s World “we’re not worthy!!” bowing and praising Alice Cooper thing (see here).  Or lets just say I’m always at a loss for words.  But I am so thankful to have found their blog,  it has been around WordPress a long time, this is by no means a new blog.  Thankfully though, this is another set of writings that gives me a glimpse of what I want to strive for, if it is even possible within me.  Poetry, stories, interesting commentary, and guest bloggers, The Erotic Writer illustriously pulls me along the highs and lows of love and lust and every erotically charged emotion one can feel.  I can’t wait to dive back into their archives.

Drumroll…My Awards (and more shit you didn’t need to know about me)!

liebster-blog-award infodaddysverynaughtylittlegirl
Back in mid-January I was nominated for the Liebster Blog Award by the very naughty little girl at the blog daddysverynaughtylittlegirl.   I am so thankful she thought of me, and I really enjoyed her questions!

She asked:

If you were dessert what would you be called?

I would be called, “Maple Cinnamon Mounds of Creamy Delight”

Who is on top of your Fantasy fuck list? (Alive/dead)

I think it might have to be Colin Kaepernick (49ers QB).  I wouldn’t mind meeting that Channing Tatum guy (I just heard my husband groan as he read this).

Which song title would best describe you? Why?

Diamonds (might as well keep up the self-confidence thing right?) Pretty and strong, and rare. And I was just listening to it.  This is a great question as I could give a different answer twenty times a day.

Which accent do you find the sexiest? Why?

South African.  Probably because when I was 22 I had a huge crush on my Philosophy of Science teacher.  I thought he was trying to pick up on me after the graduation ceremony.  Not that I would have done anything with him, he was getting married that summer (which was part of his pick-up line.)

Which part of the body do you find attractive in the opposite sex? Why?

Shoulders.  If they are broad and muscular, it tells me that they would be able to pick me up and fuck me up against a wall, hard, and good.

If you had a day to do whatever you wish; with no kids or housework, how would you spend it?

I think I really could use a spa day, like complete pampering head to toe.  Maybe first I would do yoga.  Bliss.

What would you like to receive most for your next birthday?

A gift certificate covering three months of unlimited sessions at the local Bikram Yoga studio PLUS three hours a week of watching the kids while I go.

Which housework/chore would like to pay someone else to do the most? Why?

Cleaning the bathrooms!  I just hate it, do I really need further explanation?  This is the chore I always procrastinate on.

What is your favourite drink?

I guess it would be coffee, how funny the way that happens.  It should be water, but it isn’t.

What is on top of your sexual bucket list for this year?

A threesome with a girl or a foursome with a couple.  My first priority is to actually make a bucket list.

Which genre of movie you can’t stand?

I don’t really watch horror movies because movie watching time is limited.  I fall asleep if it isn’t really engaging.   I will admit though, I am intrigued enough with horror flicks that I read spoilers for them sometimes.   I guess I don’t feel that strongly about any genre.  I will be honest, I have a VERY hard time watching musicals and I always have.  Except A Chorus Line is one of my all-time favorite movies.


award - leibster 3deviant wench

Back in late January, the lovely deviant wench nominated me for another Liebster Blog award!  I have to credit her for bringing my blog to the next level and helping me discover widgets! Kisses!!

She said:

I have noticed recently that many of my favorite blogs focus on the journey the writer is taking. And because of my own bent and interests, that’s usually a sexual journey, and often a kinky one. F&F falls squarely into that category. I’m hoping she doesn’t ever completely figure things out because then she’d probably stop writing, and that would be a disappointment. :)

And I didn’t have any questions to answer, thank you deviant wench.  She is such a hottie!


nordic-bliss-liebster-awardPanty Parade
On March 3rd I got another Liebster Blog Award from the gorgeous Panty Parade.

She said:

I get to choose 11 bloggers to keep the momentum going.  They each have their own style, some are also quirky, some write for adult audiences, and others just have a really interesting way of telling us their story.  I hope they each find the Liebster Award and my questions to them fun enough to share with their readers.  I also hope you (my readers) take a peek at their terrific writing.

And her questions were SO GOOD! Here is what she asked:

What is your favorite mythological villain (or group of villains) and why?

Zeus.  Because I see him as strong and paternal also.  I guess all the mythological villains show up as good guys in some stories.  But Zeus’s powerful fatherly figure makes him my favorite.

If you were locked in a room with Kim Kardashian and Paris Hilton, who would you kill first?

Well, if I’m killing for hunger sake I’m sorry Kim, you are first to go. Paris and I could share your butt for weeks.  (I better go check the other responses to this question, how many of us said the same thing?)

What is the biggest hurdle you still have to overcome before you reach your ultimate bliss?

Really trusting my instincts that I will know when I reach this ultimate bliss so I can revel in it.  Trust in myself (big one)

If you were on death row, what would be your last meal?

The first thing that popped into my mind would be some kind of a Thanksgiving style meal, something home-made and rich.  But then I thought, something chocolate.  It has to be chocolate.  Then later I was having sourdough toast with butter and I thought I might like to eat a whole loaf of bread and a whole stick of butter for my last meal.

What’s your wildest non-sexual fantasy?

Hmmm, you ask good questions!! I want to have some kind of adventure some time, that involves camping for a while, hiking, adventuring, and living off the land.  I don’t need something wild, just peaceful and free.  I want to observe wild horses munching on grass.   Something like that.  My husband is cringing. Ha!  Writer’s retreat?

If you were denied the opportunity to ever write again, what would you do to replace it?

Painting would replace it most definitely.

Share a recurring dream that has you intrigued but also a bit frightened.

I only have this one recurring dream:  It is always that I am going to school for my masters, and I need to drop a class because I can’t keep up with the load.  But at the end of the semester I get my report card and see that the class was not dropped at all, I just earned an F.  The professor does not budge and insists it is my fault and I earned the F.  Some nights I earn the right to re-take the class for a new grade, some nights I just have to work harder to bring up my average, but the F stays on my transcript.

If you were invited to be in a porno, would you?  Who would you like to have as your co-star?

Hell yes I would, how much are they paying?  I don’t want to sound too excited, but I take the opportunity.  I would need a girl as my co-star to show me the ropes, what do you think Panty Parade?

What’s the most dangerous thing you do on a regular basis?

I blog while my child(ren) create crafts using paint, glue, and scissors.  Or text while at stop lights (I’ve been ticketed and it is expensive, and I got a stern talking to about putting my kids in danger.)

If time stood still, where would you want to be and with whom?

Wow, what a great question!  I would be on a tropical island with my hubby, somewhere that food is plentiful and predators are scarce.

What’s your all-time favorite post on your blog? (We all want to read it!)

I think my favorite post is The Field Trip.  I need to finish that one…I keep running into firemen and remembering my obligation to that story.

Liebster Wanted To Know These Random Things About G

Liebster Blog Awards come with a rule that you have to list 11 random things about yourself.  Since I received 3 of these awards I’m going to tell you my fucking life story.  No, really, I accept this challenge (I suppose the challenge will be to the reader to stick through 33 bullet points of awesome randomness):

1.  I’ve been on an episode of a now-cancelled reality show, a music video was filmed in my bedroom at a past residence, and I’ve taken a photo that was used for the front page of the newspaper .   +3

2.  I like to ride bikes, and take mountain hikes.  But I’m horribly accident prone, so I never do it alone.  +3

3.  I love to rhyme.  Since most of the reading I do is children’s books, I can’t break out of the formula.  I’m just getting started writing poetry so I still have that urge to make it all formatted and rhyming. +3

4.   I like to start out lists like this with the best things first, and then its downhill from there. +1

5.   The first time I bought my own gas it was $1.07/gallon.  I drove an ’81 Datsun, and I wish I still owned that car.  It drove across the country and became a demolition derby car after I sold it.    +3

6.   I like hard mattresses (for sleeping).  Crisp and clean sheets pulled tight are what I find most conducive to a deep sleep. I rarely remember my dreams anymore (most likely because my sleep is still very interrupted.)  +3

7.  I just discovered we stole a library book.  My car tends to get messy.  But the book was in the bookshelf.  We will return it next story time.  +4

8.  I know I really should drink more water.  It is one of those habits that I get into and wonder how the hell I didn’t do it before.  Then I slip back out of the habit.  I don’t have many bad habits though, so that is good.   +2

9.  I have 11 more random things to tell you

10.  Tea Tree Oil is my magical hippie power essence.  It can be used for so many things.  I know it is kind of stinky…sigh. +1

11.  I feel it is best to load silverware in the dishwasher poking up so it gets cleaned better and it is easier to put away.  My favorite thing to fold is towels.  My least favorite thing to fold is fitted sheets (my mother in law is best at it).  Chicken thighs are cheaper and more flavorful than chicken breasts, I like to eat chicken even though it kind of hurts my feelings I’m responsible for their death.  I am a domestic goddess because I can make chocolate treats out of blocks of unsweetened chocolate, zucchini, and coconut oil (okay maybe a few more ingredients).  +5

12.  Even though I’m really a natural girl when it comes to my looks, my artistic urges have been emerging in makeup lately.  On date nights, I love to do dramatic eyes, popping with blues or purples or even sparkles.  Contouring and lining, and brushing the mascara on my lashes is strangely fulfilling.  I really feel that eyes are the windows… you know, to the soul. +3

13.  Being out in the open air just feels good.  I loved growing up in the mountains but I have always yearned for space, open air.  But not forever.  I just wanted it temporarily.  I also yearned for big cities and the fast pace and the elevators…just things I didn’t have in my little town.  There were no stoplights there, that is how small it was is (because there are still no stoplights).   +1

14. I’ve shaken hands with Ron Jeremy. +1

That was 33, phew!



Just the other day I was given the Beautiful Blogger Award by sweet man Dave at Normal Deviations.

His compliments make me feel silly happy:

FilledandFooled – G is… such an amazing writer; incredibly insightful, thoughtful, and absolutely fuckin’ awesome person. She’s real. (Damn, nice boobs too.)

Dave has such great insight into life, and is so funny.  If you don’t already follow him I highly suggest you visit his blog right away.



Sigh…Seamus is gone now.  He gave me this award in late January.  The link just goes to a deleted blog.  I’m sad he didn’t leave it up but he is out, and I hope he has a nice life, too.

He said:

Join me in the Gutter, wont you? Where we can get our nasty fill, and drive the others mad, with desire for what we Gutter Bloggers have! I have awarded you The Fabulous Gutter Bloggers Award! Thank you for keeping it steamy-hot up in here! Hugs, Sinner.

He asked:

What’s the kinkiest thing you’ve ever done?

I guess it would have to be sucking my husband’s cock while being fucked by another guy?  No wait, it was being  light saber fucked until I squirted by my husband while another guy watched.

What do you now know about sex that you wish you’d have known earlier in life?

That sex with intimacy is way more fulfilling than casual sex.  And squirting is good.

Is there any gutter fantasy you’d like to try?(tell us what it is)

I would like to meet another blogger (or more than one) with my husband at my side, take some photos, and have an orgasm party.

Or (please don’t get mad D) I want to join the local men’s rugby team for their after-game party and be their entertainment for the night.

What’s the funniest bedroom situation you’ve ever been in?

Hmmm, it might have to be when I got my period during a threesome? I still wonder why I wrote that.  I know, I was hoping to get this award and have something to actually link to.

Has gutter blogging taught you anything?

That writing is fun and fulfilling, sharing pictures is fun but doesn’t minimize my insecurities.

What is your favorite post from the person who nominated you?

Sigh…fuck, I wish I had copied some of his blog posts just for bedroom inspiration (if I ever need it) because his blog is gone now, not even private or dormant but just gone.  Sinner, your blog was so well written, your stories flowed and they made a whole band of merry whores wet with delight on a regular basis.  My favorite post was one of his last, where he described sex on the hood of a car.  I shudder to recall some of the imagery that ran through my head the night I read it.



Matthew Vett nominated me for the Awesome Blog Content Award as I was writing this post.  So not only does he rock my senses with his stories, but he also appreciates my blog!

He said:

Hey, I just nominated you for the Amazing Blog Content Award! I really love reading your blog. Thanks for all your hard work!

You should visit his blog for the ABC’s he did as part of the rules for this award.  To respond to his award, I did my own ABC’s (admittedly a bit different, but I have talked about myself enough in this post.)

Awesome Blog Content Award ABC’s

A – Apples of my cheeks flushed and beaded

BBehind me, you grabbed my hips and I conceded

CCelebrating our desire, the lights play above

DDelighting in the fit of our bodies and the throws of our love

EExquisite sway, we keep our own sweet sultry time

FFulfillment found as your hands wrap around mine

GGraceful entry into that blissful state

HHair pulled aside, hello neck, please have a taste

IImbibed in the lust I am yours to use

JJubilation in the trust I know there is nothing to lose

KKeenly aware of the fleeting moments contained in this night

LLanguishing in need our dance is a gorgeous sight

MMastery in the art of blocking the world around

NNihilistic delusions endlessly abound

OOrnamented ears bitten and sucked

PPassionate need and begging to be fucked

QQuiet whimpering marks my fall

RResting my hands above you on the wall

SSupple leg lifts up to wrap around your sex

TTrapped in your blue eyes I give it my best

UUnder my skirt my hot pink seam exposed

VVoluptuous breasts pulled out over my clothes

WWanton need, the only thought processed

XXenia expressed I will be your best

YYielding, filled to the hilt, warmth takes over

Z – Zealous release, as I bite your shoulder


*I acknowledge that I’ve been slack in doing this post.  I have procrastinated with reason beyond the weird vulnerability I feel in acknowledging an accomplishment.  I know you understand that real life often gets in the way of this different plane of existence, the online world.  Potty training between temper tantrums and a kid learning to read and push my buttons; this is where my mind is at most of the time.   But I am here now.

31 thoughts on “Gratitude Kind of Attitude

  1. Pussy and I agree you are worthy of every word of praise written about you darling. Thank you!!!

  2. Wow! As a relative “newbie” gutter blogger. I’m honored that you mentioned me. Thank you so much, and keep up the amazing work! 😉

  3. Hell yeah I’d be in a porno with you! Fun, fun, fun.

  4. Congratulations on such wonderful nods! And thank you SO much for passing one to me. I am so honored and your words were very sweet. I too am terrible about receiving compliments. I’ve been nominated for something in the past that I promptly dropped because I didn’t feel like I deserved it… hearing you talk about it and have similar struggles as myself makes me wonder if I really did. I wonder what it was? Also, I fully understand your struggles in parenthood… working on potty training and surviving tantrums from a two year old and a kindergartner that is learning social skills – if you’re a parent you know that this is far worse than what the two year old can do.

    Again, thank you so much!

  5. Whoa, that’s a long award post sweetie 😉 congratulations on all the awards! xxxxx

  6. Did I read that right? You created a NEW award? Genius!! And I agree – you deserve every single one of these awards, and more. Maybe I will create a “best blogger friend” award to give to you! ❤ (ps I love the smell of tea tree oil)

  7. This was a wonderful post, full of wit and entertainment and fun.

    Hey, just like your other posts!

  8. What a great award response post. I believe this is the best response to awards post I’ve ever read. You’re an awesome writer, G. No argument allowed.

    Love your ABCs response. If I ever get that award pushed my way, I’m gonna use this as inspiration.

    Oh, and one thing I have to point out… (and I really suspect you put that in there because…)

    What is your favourite drink?

    I guess it would be coffee…

    The key word there, sweetie, is drink. 🙂

  9. Congrats on receiving, giving and creating some wonderful awards!

  10. If you master the all intriguing potty, please give a sistah some tips over here! Losing my mind!!!! xxx

  11. Hottie? Aw, shucks. ::blushes::

    (See, you’re not the only one who’s slow to get around to things….took me 2 weeks to get to this!! LOL)

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